Thursday, October 17, 2013

Setting Examples

So today, one of my friends mentioned something on Facebook that really bugged me and empowered me at the same time. Here's the direct quote:

"Some men on twitter have decided it is "fat shaming week" which is directed entirely at women. Lately I have been making a conscious choice to love my body image no matter what society is saying is beautiful. Stay strong lady loves and feel free to punch heteronormative white skinny ideals of beauty in the throat."

What? Fat shaming week? Really? Now here's a challenge to all you women: Name one man in your life, not one out of a magazine, just someone you personally know, who has a full six pack abs, the perfect muscles, and is totally comfortable with their perfect body? I bet you can't. How is it that men can have a little bit of chunk to them and women can't? We are "shamed" and they can do whatever they want to? 

Then I really actually started thinking about it and this double standard is as old as the day is long. It's just something that happens and the best thing women can do is to empower ourselves and be comfortable with our own body. 

I myself have always been on the heavier side of the skinny girl scale. I'm generally big boned, tall, and I've got some "fluff" that I'm not exactly proud of but I accept it. If it really bothered me I would have done something about it by now. Saying that you accept yourself the way you are and actually doing it are two entirely different things too though...

As nurses, we are expected to lead healthy lifestyles. I for one down coffee like it's my job, eat when I'm stressed, haven't set foot in a gym or exercised in months, and I get little sleep. So how am I, as a nurse supposed to turn around to my patient and say, "You need to lose weight" or "You need to exercise  "Too much caffeine is bad for you." It's a double edged sword. 

Likewise, I was working in a facility and one of the nurses there, not to be rude or mean in any way, but was considered obese. I can remember one of the residents pulling me aside at supper and asking me, "How can she take care of me when she can't take care of herself?" This struck me. That's a really good point. So then I'm faced with the thought, do I put on this healthy lifestyle facade for my patients and be a hypocrite or do I keep quiet and not judge their lifestyle choices? 

This matter goes far beyond just the numbers on a scale. Smoking, drinking, exercising, eating habits, we are all setting examples for our patients and that's a lot of pressure. Now throw in the factor that men are declaring this week "fat shaming week" and the fact that us not only as female nurses but as females need to live up to society's standards of a perfect woman? Yikes. That's enough to make you want to stress indulge on a bag of cheetoes. 

On a related topic, everyone, men, women, teenagers, children, EVERYONE needs to see this video. Dove Beauty Campaign is doing a marvelous job addressing the topic of loving yourself, size put aside.


As Taylor Swift says, stay beautiful. 

3 comments:

  1. "How can she take care of me when she can't take care of herself?"

    That comment has been bugging me since I read it earlier this afternoon. The woman has earned a nursing degree. She holds a job. And I'm going to assume those aren't the only two things she's accomplished in her life. So why should anyone make a huge assumption that she can't take care of herself just based on her weight? For all we know, she might be doing all sorts of other wonderful things in her life. (And I do get that it was the resident who made the comment, not you.)

    I have one friend who blames every problem I ever have with my health (and I don't have that many) on my weight, including the migraines I've had for 3/4 of my life and a knee injury that was caused by a car accident. She's that way about every woman she knows -- their weight eclipses absolutely everything else.

    Instead of thinking of it as a healthy lifestyle facade, can you look at it as no one does it all right? "Too much caffeine is bad for the human body" instead of "You need to..."?

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  2. Hi there Kalissa, I was reading through your site and would like to speak with you regarding a possible collaboration. Please email me at trucillo(dot)mario(at)gmail(dot)com, thank you!

    Mario

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  3. I hope you blog more. I would love to read it.

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